Good Read...

"A person's life story is equal to what they have plus what they want most in the world, minus what they're actually willing to sacrifice for it. You find out those things about someone and you'll know almost everything. The fractional numbers are their headshakes, facial tics or finger movements they don't realize they're doing, and they all add up if you can spot them."

~'The Contortionist's Handbook', Craig Clevenger~

Eye, eye, Cap'n...

I know, I have been absolutely horrendous about updating lately... I guess it can all be attributed to my crazy work schedule for the past month and half or so -- long days, some late nights, a good bit of total confusion, and whole lot of brain mush when it's all said and done. And let's face it: it's boring to hear someone else bitch about work, so for once, I won't. But just this one time.......

My eyes are doing so much better after a couple weeks of blurred vision (yes, that is my eye there to the left & below) -- to the point that it was hard to read the computer screen at times (karma for making fun of Mike, no doubt), making it quite difficult to work on what was an already daunting task! Turns out it is was because my eyes are severely dry (despite the fact that I've been putting those damn drops in constantly!), leaving dead cells to blur my vision. Ew, right? Anyway, apparently, I'm 1 in 20 or so people who have eyes that get this dry after having LASIK. Ahhhh, it's good to be a statisic..

Wow. My extracurricular life could use a boost right now, because I've got nothing here. Wait, yes I do! Jon & I are planning a trip to Chicago this summer, that's something. I always love the "planning stage" of trips! Got tickets to a Cubs game, a bit of shopping on Michigan Avenue, I'm sure JP will indulge me and do the Brookfield Zoo & the Art Institute of Chicago (oh come on, he knows he'll enjoy it, too!)...

Have a long weekend trip with a bunch of girlfriends to Orange Beach for a weekend of soaking up the good life and the infamous Mullet Toss at the Flora-Bama... Pure class, people. Pure class. You never know, this could end up reeeeeally ugly -- I mean, the possibilities are endless... You know, I mean that in a totally fun & hilarious way, of course... At least we hope (wink, wink)... Stay tuned.......

Guess You Gotta "Hand" It To Him, Huh?

A crocodile at a zoo in the southern Taiwan city of Kaohsiung holds the forearm of a zoo veterinarian in between its teeth, April 11, 2007. The crocodile bit off the arm of the zoo veterinarian treating it, an official reported. Dated April 11, 2007. REUTERS/Frank Lin (TAIWAN)

Click HERE for more details...

Mother Nature, You Fickle Bitch...

Last week? Warm & sunny. Last weekEND? Well below freezing. And now, in a mere week's time, it is going to be nearly 90°F here in Mississippi!!! Southerners are a pretty hardy people and all, but this is getting a bit ridiculous... I mean, more than 70-degree swings within a 5-day span? Come on... most importantly, how do you follow the proper dressing etiquette when the weather does not match the season? Constant risk of a MAJOR fashion faux pas, especially now that Easter has come and gone. For the love of Susan Powter, Stop The Insanity!!!

Speaking of Easter (and of cold, for that matter)........ Jon & I went down to the coast with my parents for this past weekend and let me tell you, it was colder than a witch's titty on Saturday! The only thing that made it tolerable? The yummy Bloody Mary that my mom had waiting on me when I got up at 9 a.m. :
Since you cannot tell just from the picture, that would be me with ZERO makeup, bundled up in my flannel pj's, t-shirt, sweatshirt, the thickest bathrobe I have ever encountered in my life, two blankets, and one pillow. Like I said, it was COLD. However, far be it from us to let the weather ruin an otherwise perfectly good weekend!!!What it all boils down to is, I could have been cold at the beach, or I could have been cold at home... and given that choice, I'd take the beach any day of the week, and twice on Sunday!!!

Family Knows Best.

Grandmother: "Did you not go [to such-and-such event]?"
Kelly: "Nah, I didn't feel like it. I've talked to people all day long at work and I'm sick of trying to fake nice all the time. I just didn't feel like doing it anymore."
Grandmother: "Good, better to just go home where you can be your regular mean self."
Kelly: "That's right."

God, how I love my grandmother... ;)

pinch da heads, suck da tails..

See that up there? Those are the remnants of some good-ass crawfish!!! Thanks to Laura and her family for inviting ALL of us to suck some heads and pinch some tails at their camphouse in Macon, Mississippi (and I use the word "camphouse" lightly as this place was absolutely amazing!!!)... Though there was a little bit here & there of the usual atrocious behavior -- religious debates, lovers' quarrels, inappropriate commentary, even late-night karaoke -- a good time was had by all!!!!
The above pics came from both myself and my friend Meredith, but I have to say that this little beauty I shot of Kapree takes the damn cake! Ahhh, gotta love "The Drumstick Whore" pose... ;)