Wednesday, December 20, 2006

Fatness and Stuff.

"A passenger waits for a delayed flight at Heathrow airport's terminal four in London August 12, 2006. Dieters may find some welcome assistance from a new nasal spray that could help resist the appetizing aromas of cinnamon bun stands, pizza parlors or tempting bakeries."

That looks just like the outfit I was wearing at the airport the other... hey, wait just a gosh-darn minute! Is that MY fat ass!? No, but seriously, what if that were YOUR fat ass Yahoo! has plastered as their example of the hefty traveller? Ladies & gentlemen, that is proof that you should have to pay more if your ass takes up more than one seat. How would you like to be crammed in next to those saddle bags on a long flight? Don't lie, it would be miserable & you know it.

I guess that sort of stood out to me because I am feeling like a big fat blob with all the munching & eating I've been doing these past couple of weeks (besides the fact that it's hard to look past an ass THAT large). I mean, really blob-ish. Bring out the fat girl clothes because the diet ain't startin' again until after Christmas. I mean, there is really no point in even kidding myself into thinking I might be able to eat better until then, is there?

And on a totally random note, should I be at all concerned that the tv shows I watch late at night seem to air commercials for only a select array of products & services: phone sex/chat lines (now including male-to-male hook-ups), Winsor Pilates (seriously, for how many years can I hear the words, "51-year old Pilates guru Mari Winsor..." -- what, does it keep you from having birthdays, too?), herpes medications, and debt consolidation? I mean, what does that say about my taste in t.v. shows considering the demographic these advertisers are targeting? It's not good, I know that much. [For the sake of my own dignity, I do feel compelled to say that I do not engage in phone chats -- gay or hetero, do not do Pilates, do not have herpes, nor do I need to consolidate any debt, so their money is wasted on me... HA! Does that redeem me enough? No? Eh...]

In more important news, I have sort of taken on a new critter. On several different occasions, I have walked outside onto my front porch only to have something go scampering off into the woods... Well, the other night, we caught sight of each other and, I swear, the reincarnated version of my deceased sweet kitty Diesel was there on my porch! (that's him in the picture to the left there -- HERE is a picture of Diesel) Looks like him, acts like him, everything... So I just could not resist a little bit of spoiling with food, treats & rubs... (I drew the line at letting him come inside -- though he wanted to! -- to keep him from facing an over-excited set of dogs & a very pissed-off cat!)... But is he a cutie or what? We bonded right off the bat -- love, love, love!!!

We all know I can't resist a sweet face or a cute critter... ;)

3 Comments:

Blogger Sailor said...

It's gonna take more than nasal spray to wedge that fat ass into any sort of normal sized seat!

Maybe she be shipped out as freight.

You are too funny, girl.

1:18 PM  
Blogger Silent One ~D~ said...

I too feel like the dieting is going nowhere! It is so hard to eat right... at this time of the year. No use complaining... will just have to wait till after Christmas to really start.

Your newly adopted critter... is a twin to your Diesel. Sweet kitty! Spread the love around!

Merry Christmas to you and J!
Enjoy the season!

9:12 AM  
Blogger speachamerica said...

You sound so sweet. i hope you have time to help me and help yourself too. I learned of a plan where you can use your spare time to earn a little money like the google ad sense. it is called Agloco.com/r/BBCB0774. all you have to do is download their view bar.....

4:20 PM  

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