New & Innovative Ideas for Child-Rearing...

Eighteen-month-old Olivia Rose, right, peers out of one of the kennels next to Basset Hound, Daisy Mae, while visiting her veterinarian mother, Dr. Bev Cappel, at her clinic, Wednesday, Nov. 15, 2006, in Chesnut Ridge, N.Y. Olivia briefly eluded her mother, who was speaking to a visitor, and wandered into the kennel and closed the door on her own. She was discovered shortly after by a vet technician. (AP Photo/Julie Jacobson)

That's awesome. Already "crate-training" your child at such a young age! You totally rock, Dr. Bev!

It's Done!

The tree is up, the lights have been strung (thanks, Jon!), and the ornaments have been hung... so many that you can scarcely see any green at all -- lovely! I absolutely adore this time of year!!! Holiday cheer in photographic form from the tree-decorating night shown below:
And so, on that note... Happy Holidays, y'all!!!

Another Round of "ENOUGH ALREADY!!!"

3 Names: Clay Aiken. Kelly Ripa. Rosie O'Donnell. Enough... the fuck... already... {click blog title for story} Would anyone have even been offended that Kelly Ripa may have implied that Clay was gay if they didn't assume the same thing? I'm sure she would have had the same reaction if Carrot Top had clamped his sweaty paw over her mouth, and we all know he's a pimp. Ha... But seriously, Rosie, come on. We haven't been missing your gay rights & persecution accusations, so don't bring them back. Please? JUST SHUT THE FUCK UP, OK? Again, I said please.

Personally, I wouldn't want Clay Aiken's nasty-ass hands anywhere near my mouth -- gay, straight, asexual, whatever. Seriously, regardless of anything aside from just looking at him, you DON'T know where that hand has been, honey! She's just a smart gal, that's all... He could have just wiped his ass or crushed a booger, who knows. I mean, he's a creepy-looking, nerdy kid... he's just, EWW. So yea for you, Kelly Ripa! (Plus, she's just so darn cute, it's hard for me to think bad of her...)

But honestly, why is this a big deal? It's not like the media is really deprived of material or anything. People, who really gives a shit? I mean, this is even less interesting to me than the TomKat wedding (I changed the channel every time that story came on... which was a lot) I can't even believe I'm taking the to write about it. Pitiful. Let this be enough already & move on, please...

Final --> Kelly: 1, Clay: 0, Rosie: Shut Up & Go Away.

Bill Maher Is A Fucking Idiot.

As published in Star Magazine -- mind you, in one of the two issues that I received today [I would tell you which issue # or whatever, but they kindly cover that & the date with my address label, fuckers.] -- the below excerpt references Mr. Maher's appearance & choice of costume at the Playboy Mansion (with honorable intentions, no doubt):

"... irreverant TV talker Bill Maher arrived dressed as a Crocodile Hunter with a stingray going through his chest. When irate guests complained to host Hugh Hefner, Hef shot back, 'It's a free world -- what do you want me to do about it?' "

And, to think, he looks so stunning. But seriously... I cannot even begin to fathom what possessed even an absurd & hostile little man like Bill Maher to not find this Halloween costume way too disgusting & offensive to wear. It's called human decency, and I think this is a perfect example of the opposite.

In keeping with this post's title, BILL MAHER IS A FUCKING IDIOT.

Lovely Little Things...

Have you ever had a piece of clothing that you would consider killing or dying for? As in, if you tried to steal it from me, I would either kill you or you would have to kill me first? Well, this is mine -- the softest, most comfortable, most wonderful red sweatshirt in the whole wide world: Isn't she a beaut? And why am I posting a picture of it? Hell, if I know... It just makes me smile (it's the little things in life, you know?). I almost lost it for good once, but we found our way back to one another... it's true love.

Keeping with the title of this post (not to mention, hopefully keeping this less boring by cutting down on my incessant rambling!), here are a couple of other pictures I've taken lately of lovely things (dogs & fall colors):
In other unrelated news, this story is just weird: Cat allegedly gives birth to dog-like offspring... but yet, how cool would it be to have a cat/dog!? That cat must be a little slut to have been doin' it with a dog. ;)

So, if anyone is looking for an unusual Christmas gift for me (and I just know you all are!), the cat/dog hybrid baby would be perfect!!!

enough already...

Tom Cruise & Katie Holmes got married.

OKAY, WE FUCKING GET IT!!!

It's not that big of a deal. Stop. Please.

High on Family Guy...

Yes, I did. And I'll do it again if I want.

I got up this morning with a hankering to wear my cowboy boots today. The only caveat? Well, I had to work today. But is that any reason to sway a good cowgirl's mood? Hell no! So here I am, in full form, with my cowboy boots on (okay, so they're Cole Haan cowboy boots, but still...) and a pair of demin trousers. Not jeans, MOM, trousers. See, I've gotta be on my toes about all things jeans since my mother has this undying hatred for them, especially in the workplace -- that is, unless they're cute, like my embroidered ones, and not "those ugly Wrangler-types"... and since I work in the family business, I never know when a fashion critique in the form of a "Mom-visit" might happen! (But guess who's out-of-town right now? Score!)

However, today I did not care. The ever-so-lovely boots make me happy so I put 'em on... and dammit, I look cute!!!

Next...

Oh, Hell the Fuck NO!!!!

JACKSON, Miss. — A Democratic congressman from New York says he wasn't trying to insult Mississippi in published remarks Thursday, but a Republican colleague from Mississippi says
Rep. Charles Rangel should apologize to the state.

Rangel, D-N.Y., was quoted in a Thursday article in The New York Times, saying: "Mississippi gets more than their fair share back in federal money, but who the hell wants to live in Mississippi?"

Rep. Chip Pickering, R-Miss., issued a news release criticizing Rangel's words.

"I hope his remarks are not the kind of insults, slander, and defamation that Mississippians will come to expect from the Democrat leadership in Washington, D.C.," Pickering said.

Elbert Garcia, Rangel's press secretary in New York, said Rangel had received calls Thursday about the Mississippi quote.

Garcia e-mailed The Associated Press a response from Rangel: "I certainly don't mean to offend anyone, I just love New York so much that I can't understand why everyone wouldn't want to live here."

[Oh, riiiiiiiiiiiiiiight... That's it. Great explanation there, Chuck. You know, it worries me that the future of our country rests in the hands of people like yourself, who cannot even come up with a better justification for an offensive comment than that. As a politician, aren't you supposed to be a *professional* liar (ha!)? I mean, do they not teach you people classes on that? Well, from me in Mississippi to you and your Al Sharpton-looking ass wherever you are, Charles Rangel: a big ol' fat FUCK YOU. I feel quite sure that you are -- in a lovely twist of irony -- no longer welcome in the Hospitality State.]

Just a Little Random Stuff.

By watching the silly shows I so revel in, such as "Entertainment Tonight" and "E! News", last night, I was able gather some very valuable -- and no doubt useful (ha!) -- knowledge &/or details about the lives of celebrities (sad, I know):

1.) Britney left K-Fed. Okay, yeah, ummm, there wasn't even a brief period of shock on that one. Sorry. It's pitiful when you can make more money JUST BY GOING AWAY.

2.) Ellen DeGeneres likes animals. (in a good way, you with your minds in the gutter!) Therefore, I like Ellen DeGeneres. Just check out her American Express commercial where she fulfills her childhood dream of working with animals. "There's no need to be sarcastic, Roger." (okay, so you had to see the clip to understand) And the raccoon applying eye shadow? Priceless...

3.) And while we're on the subject of lesbians, Paula Poundstone... I know it may be her "personal style", but quit it with the men's ties already. She looks ridiculous. And for someone trying to overcome past accusations of child molestation or alcoholism or whatever? Not such a good look, I don't think. Seems kind of perv-ish or something to me. Sorry, but it does.

4.) Anna Nicole. Oh, Anna Nicole. The drama never ends for you, does it, honey? First the old dead husband and the fight for his money, then the who's-the-daddy baby, next the mysteriously dead son, mixed in with the creepy lawyer/co-"committed", Howard K. Stern, then she's hospitalized in the same hospital that her son died in, and now the reported Bahamian home eviciton? Seriously, what could possibly be next!? Stay tuned, it's bound to get even better, bless her heart...

5.) Oh, and Ryan Seacrest is soooooo gay. Good Lord. Metrosexual, my ass... (not that there's anything wrong with that... ha.)

Tids & Bits...

• I'm telling you... a trip to Waffle House is always good for some sort of entertainment (or dispute resolution): Nude Couple's Feud Ends at Waffle House
• Further proof that Kanye West is self-obsessed, egocentric, selfish & seriously lacking in judgment: I present you with a situational example of the term "sore loser".
• Damn, it missed: Concertgoer throws drink at Streisand... Ha, ha! Trying to douse Yentl as she mouths off? Beautiful!!! If it had actually hit her, the outrageous prices she has the nerve to charge for her tickets might be money well-spent.
• Duct tape no substitute for a babysitter, police say... No shit? Glad to learn these things before I have kids. Though I still live under the delusion that duct-tape can fix anything. Even pesky children who won't stay put.
• Wine extract keeps mice fat and healthy -- What a coincidence! It keeps ME fat & healthy, too!!!
• Is it terrible that I find this funny, Couric's Loss, Vieira's, O'Donnell's Gain? Of course not! I just can't stand that gummy Katie Couric. Blech! I really want to slap that shit-eating grin off of her horse face every time I see her.
• Oh, look! The French are still uppity, snobbish assholes: French press declares Halloween dead, attributed to "a cultural reaction linked to the rise of anti-Americanism." Uh, okay, whatever. You know, of all people who would enjoy dressing up in ridiculous costumery so they can prance around and call it culture, I would have thought it would be the French. Go figure... (And now their power went out? I'd be lying if I said I didn't chuckle a bit at that news...)

My Avatar Kicks Ass!

Every time I send an instant message and my avatar pops up on the screen, it gives me the warm fuzzies inside because, as you can clearly see, it literally KICKS ASS!!! Don't mess with me, fucker...

In other news: Ladies, you have been warned... I will not be held responsible for anything that the wearing of this outfit may lead him to do.